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Bagpipes? What the haka!

23 Sep

Subrosa was writing about the banning of bagpipes at the Rugby World Cup in New Zealand. That got me thinking.  How far are we away from not saying things are banned? Before you drift off and start contemplating how wonderfully liberating that will be I should point out that there would be a downside. And… yes you’ve guessed it… a downside so large it will be larger than a very large thing indeed.

The down side is they’ll move away from saying things are banned and swiftly start to talking about things which aren’t banned. This will be because there will be so few things which aren’t banned it will easier to list just those.

The thing is what won’t be banned? Breathing? Well maybe selective breathing for those who have value. Obviously the value will be determined by those who know best so politicians, administrators, the Judiciary, the Police, journalists (although not right wing or with “Murdoch” anywhere in their name or in a previous name), lefties and greenies will be fine

Old people, smokers, drinkers, obese people, drivers, football fans, political bloggers, hoodies, the unemployed, single parents, middle aged white males, etc. need not apply for a breathing license.  They won’t need one since they won’t be breathing. A nice and tidy solution indeed!!

Perhaps, before we get to that point, fashions will have changed.  Perhaps a new cycle will begin. A cycle that heralds a new movement called “The Human Movement” which will become very, very popular. The Humans will worship all human achievement. They will free humans from persecution. They will recognise smoking and drinking as part of freedom of choice. They will drive cars, be tolerant of other people’s lifestyles even if they don’t align with their own. The environment will, be there to be enjoyed and biodiversity left to diversify.

They may not do away with banning things altogether though. They will probably retain only two things on the banned list. They will ban politicians and bag pipes.

Nae luck pal!

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Posted by on September 23, 2011 in Politics

 

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