The bastion of our televisual delights has returned to our TV screens. Which one I hear you ask, the one and only Big Brother of course! It’s not just the run if the mill Joe Public version either it’s the … “sleb” version.
I’d been vaguely aware of Big Brother being on during the past few months. I hadn’t been watching it! I mean come on. I had my moment of realisation of the waste of time that big Brother was when I found myself watching people washing the dishes whilst taking part in a very early series of Big Brother. I mean, how sad is that? My defence is that I was younger then and my appreciation of the value of time was a bit different than it is now.
I only knew Big Brother was on because I’d come across it when I was flicking through the channels of an evening looking for programmes which involved men building custom motorbikes, custom cars, restoring older cars, fixing unfeasibly large machines, blowing things up, shooting guns, digging big holes, building or renovating properties etc. etc. I also watch men buying and selling the contents of abandoned storage units, antiques in general and the odd and the wonderful.
My TV viewing is educational if nothing else as I tune in to politics and documentaries. I also watch the odd foreign Police thriller. I say watch but what I mean is read on screen. My Danish, Norwegian and Italian are obviously non-existent and so I can’t be surfing the net etc. Oh well…
Anyway, Big Brother low rent version seems to have finished and glitzy “sleb” version is now on. I checked what was going on. There are four slebs which you could say are “slebs” but of a lower denomination than real “slebs’. They are Julie Goodyear from Corrie, a woman who was on Eastenders apparently, Julian Clary and one of the Kemp bros from Spandau Ballet but not the one who was in Eastenders. As clear as mud?
The “big four slebs” must have fallen on hard times or have reached a value level at which Channel 5 can afford to pay them. Either way it’s not good. The others include people who think they are “slebs” but aren’t really. There are, of course, a couple of ladies there who are of the blonde/orange/pneumatic chest/skinny/clueless clan of “slebs”. And a mixture of ethnicities so they can lay claim to be down with the bros in the streets. The demographic is all.
I’ve no doubt that there will be a lot of shouting and arguing, a lot of backstabbing and a lot of petulant and spoilt behaviour. Just like real life then. Well as real life can be when you are living in a goldfish bowl and purposely doing things, which will get you in the newspapers and enhance your chance of growing your “sleb” status, such as that might be.
I really thought that Big Brother had died. It should have really. Was it ever entertainment? Well if you enjoy watching someone washing the dishes then it’s right up your street.
At the moment on TV the programme about people making cakes competitively is quite entertaining in a “it’s not cooked enough, it’s a funny shape, did you read the recipe at all type of way. The nice old lady judge is quite splendid and the grumpy Liverpudlian guy judge is going to make sure the bakers sweat more than normal in HIS kitchen!
24 Hours in A&E was good but it’s just finished and not enough people died in it, which gave the impression that, you go to hospital and are cured almost every single time. The staff featured seemed like a really nice and very capable bunch of people. No mention of the 30,000 people who die every year because of happened or didn’t when they were being cared for by the NHS.
I’ll stick to the cars and motorbikes and the like, the faster and louder the better. Big boys toys right enough.