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Monthly Archives: August 2015

Judith Ralston and the hankie of doom

Well… Black arm bands have been handed out, flowers are being ordered in excess of princess quantities and flags are flying at half mast. The news, as you already know, is that the BBC have sacked the MET Office. Rumour on the street was this had occurred because the MET hadn’t delivered the level of global warming that the BBC wanted! I’ve heard stranger things.

Anyway back to the black arm bands. The new weather deliverers will probably not require the services of the hand waving, button clicking, smiling regardless of the forecast weather people presenters. This is a bad thing. You may have missed the fact that weather presenters have lives. They have mortgages as well and they have to eat and drink even to excess if the forecast was miles away from their earlier forecast. Coats are hanging on shooglie pegs, unless they were raincoats last used during that barbecue summer that the Met completely misplaced.

At this point I have to apologise due to my lack of postings featuring weather presenters or actually just one weather presenter. I’ve been busy. I have found Facebook and Twitter. I’m sorry about that. I’ll make up for it right now then.

Judith Ralston. You’ll have heard of Judith. Some people, and I’m including myself here, refer to Judith as Miss Whiplash. There was a time before weans when Judith’s wardrobe was, how can I say this? Ah, yes. Severe and pre-50 shades of grey although black was the preferred colour, or it would have been if black was in fact a colour. Scottish males watching a weather forecast by Judith could not remember a single thing about the weather. Oh no, Judith put a spell on them it was glorious. But it’s time passed.

Recently we have two episodes of interest from Judith, neither of which relates to weather at all. Firstly, she appeared on a weather forecast with what looked like a wardrobe malfunction. On closer inspection it turned out to be a paper hankie which she’d stuffed up her short sleeve. It peeked shaky for a few moments and started to get bolder. I willed it to fall but Jackie Bird alerted Judith. Secondly, one evening at the end of the bulletin the camera panned out, just in time to catch Judith dancing along to the news tune. Happy in her work. Awwwwww.

No one will be able to replace Judith. It doesn’t matter if they are Dutch or from new Zealand. There is not a single weather lady in the world that could fill Judith’s shoes. They may well get the weather forecast more accurate but who needs that if it means removing Judith from our screens? We can always look out the windae for goodness sake!

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