You may have noticed that the Eurovision Song Contest came around again. Why does the UK take part? This year the UK entry finished second last out of forty two countries. I actually thought that the song, this year, wasn’t bad at all although challenging for the singer.Engelbert Humperdinck was of course signing this song and whilst it sounded pretty good as a recording, Engelbert just didn’t have enough power and control in his voice to do it justice. It was a better song than the scoring implied and we all know why that was.
The voting isn’t just a travesty it’s completely ridiculous. Country A, allocates points to countries which are neighbours or countries which they are their big mates with or want to be big mates with. Albania did pretty well, although their song was just ridiculous and the woman singing it had a long cat fur ball stuck to her chest. The song was dreadful and contained a part that only dogs could hear, much to their pain and disgust.
The winning song from Sweden has already been hugely successful all around Europe in the past few months, which may have been part of the strategy to help it score well. A bit Kate Bushesque sort of. There were lots of songs which were poor, sounded like 1970s disco with nothing really modern and edgy. So what is the point?
The UK has a huge wealth and asset in all manner of bands and artists who write and perform music from a huge variety of genres. These artists and band tour all over the world and fill the largest venues, sell millions of records or downloads if you prefer and do this repeatedly.
Yet we can’t win Eurovision? Even the great “Lord” Andrew Lloyd Webber failed!
So what to do.
Walk away could be an option but I feel there maybe an alternative route to consider. We could continue to take part but only in an exceptionally irreverent manner. Sing badly, dress horrifically, be dramatically incoherent and vote in a manner, which suggests our mental capacity has been somewhat misplaced as evidenced by our utterly bizarre voting.
We should also ensure that the person who provides the voting from the UK behaves and dresses in a more outrageous manner than the chap from Finland did this year. It seems frighteningly challenging but I feel confident that someone in the UK would be able to out do the example set or indeed the gauntlet thrown down!
There maybe a place for Morris Dancing, spiky, punk pogoing, Nick Cave doom and gloom, Rolf Harris wobble boards and silly noises… Or we could send Status Quo, Ozzy Osborne, Motorhead or the like.
Lets treat it with the contempt it’s due!